Saturday, February 9, 2013

Saying goodbye...

Our little emergency foster baby left yesterday.  I haven't cried so hard in a very long time.

We all thought we would be relieved with his new placement but we miss him.  So much so, that immediately as the worker was leaving with him, Bubba started crying first and I ran to call Matt who told me to try to get M.J. back!
So M.A.N.Y. confused emotions!
I immediately called his case worker to request they allow us to keep him.  I called our worker too.  I couldn't get anyone on the phone so I left messages & wrote emails and bawled like a baby!
They both called me back just as soon as they could.  M.J. needed to go to this other family for now.  It is closer to his relatives, which allows for visitations.
I don't know what's going to happen, but I know the Lord doesn't make mistakes, even when we feel like we've made mistakes by giving up an emergency placement.  The Lord works EVERYTHING out for our good!  He has that baby in His grip.  We did Family Worship every night he was here.  We loved on him thru the midst of his inability to stop crying.  We prayed over him.  We told him he was special & loved.  I know he felt loved.  Bubba kissed him & hugged him the most.  It was the sweetest, most precious thing I have ever seen!

Please help us pray for M.J.  For the Lord to place him in a safe, loving environment where he will hear about our Jesus and for him to adjust quickly to his new foster family.

And if you know of a Foster Family in your church or workplace, or maybe on your street...please OFFER TO HELP them!!!  We could've kept M.J. if we had more help.  I wish I had asked for more physical help...

Things that helped us (or that would've helped us) & that may help your Fostering Friends:

- free child care for just a couple hours both during the day (for mom to get things accomplished, chores, errands run, a NAP or to home school the older kids w/out distractions) and also in the evening (adding an additional child into a family unit can be stressful, especially at first because it changes the family dynamics...having a sitter allows for date nights or one on one times w/ other kiddos) (Thanks to Hayley Bobay for doing this one morning for me so I could homeschool the girls!  Also, Emily Northam & Tatum Miles and of course our girls, for giving Matt & I little coffee dates away from the house. (Thank you sweet girls!!!)

- help w/whatever needs doing at the house or errands that need running (Matt's mom came & helped w/ cleaning & making baby food a few days.  My friend Chris dropped off dinner & then proceeded to fold my towels strewn all over the couch even tho I protested the whole time for her to stop. Thank YOU!!!)

- loaning or giving necessary items you have laying around your attic (we had SO MUCH help in this department!!!  We were given a crib, toy cars, loaned a double stroller, car seat, safety gates & a few more clothing items)  Thank you friends!!!

- money, gift cards to help buy additional supplies (believe it or not, people aren't in this for the money, we spent way more on M.J. than what the state will reimburse us)

- encouragement

- dinners ready to throw in the oven

- short visits to help the family feel not-so-alone

- starbucks drop offs (thank you sweet Stephanie Pruitt!)

- throwing a party for birthday baby when Foster Mom has only slept 10 hours in 5 days! (Thanks Jules!!!)

I am sure our family was blessed in other ways, but the sleep hasn't quite been made up yet, so I can't recall all of it right now.
If you want to know what would've helped us the most - it would've been PHYSICAL help...actually entering our home & helping with the babies so that I could get school done w/in a quicker time frame & taking a nap would've made all the difference in the world.  {Having 2 teething babies, one of which also has FPIES meant we didn't get much sleep.} Next time I WILL ask for help in that department.  Not everyone is called to Foster, but family & friends CAN all pitch in to help a Foster Family.  :)

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