Posting this with permission from the author:
I don't know if this will help you. I sure hope it will just a little (or maybe alot). During Dylan's lesson today. We were reading about Joseph. We read about his dreams the Lord gave him (before his brothers threw him in a well). Then we read about his brothers conspiring and ultimately throwing him in the well to get rid of him. I know you are familiar with the story, probably even more than I am. But, I felt the Lord bring you to mind. How He gave you a dream, since you were young, of a baby boy. And, now, here you are, in the process of making that dream come true (who'd thought, 5 years ago, you be HERE today?). I know there is a lot of waiting, yearning, and longing involved. But, the lesson was about how God can bring good out of what others try and mean for bad (this is on D's 2nd grade level here, so pardon the elementary speech). I imagined Joseph being scared in that well. Probably thinking "what are you doing here God?!" He had to have been scared and confused! I doubt he thought that dream would come true as he sat at the bottom of that well. I have been thinking so much about why/how God works things out the way He does. How I don't understand WHY things happen the way they do. But also seeing that God does keep His promises. I never understand the process when I'm in the middle of it. But I feel like the enemy (in the story, his brothers) has come against you fiercely. You are probably asking aot of the same questions. But, I know God will work it out to His glory, and your good. He promises that. He doesn't say the road there will be quick and easy. I know you know that and understand that. I just felt the Lord impress on my heart to share that with you.
I know you are hurting and struggling. I'm so sorry you are. I am praying for you! That is all I can do. I am here for you. I know I don't understand your struggles, but I am here to pray with you or whatever it is I CAN do. If you'd like to hang out, visit, or do something fun together, soon, I'm up for that too. I miss you! You are on my mind all the time!
Praying for you and love you!!!
And this...will get me through another day & hopefully it can help someone else having a long bout of "why" with the Lord! Thanks friend :)
Beautiful.
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